Today I have been soaking in the exquisite blue-sky, biting cold, snow-laden day from the comfort of a warm house. The joy of a cup of coffee in a patch of sun and silence makes my heart pour over with joy. It seems strange to love this harsh beauty all around me. Ordinarily January is a hard month for me. There is the let down after the whirl and excitement of holidays. The glum gray weather and short daylight conspire to drag my heart down. It is so easy to just push my nose into a book, or let my eyes glaze over staring at a home improvement re-run, or mindlessly tap keys to play a computer game. I shrug off the nudges of conscience that urge me to get that project done, or get busy in my studio again now that there is time to work. I slouch my way through the days with a niggling undercurrent of embarrassment at my sloth and indolence.

Thankfully, God doesn’t let His kids wallow and wander too long or too far. A few days ago, in the gray gloom of despair, I prayed and asked for relief. His Spirit gently nudged me to bring my trouble to Him.

“Casting all your cares on Him, because He cares for you.”

So, almost reluctantly (to my shame—there is a perverse delight in being miserable sometimes, isn’t there?) I took out my Bible and got on my knees. I asked for help to break out of the miserable hole in which I found myself.

“Here I am, God. I feel like a slug. I have gained too many pounds eating mindlessly during the holidays. I have been lazing around building bad habits that are dragging me down and ruining my witness for You. I have procrastinated on several major projects and now I am in a state of immobile misery. Help me! Stir me up to want to do what I should. Create in me a desire for the things that honor and delight You. I can’t do this on my own. I even know that in my old self I don’t want to ‘straighten up.’ Please help me.”

My prayer was not terribly eloquent. Not fancy. But from my miserable heart to His kind and listening ear, Jesus stood at the Throne of the Father and interceded for me. And, Faithful Father! He sent out His Holy Spirit to come along side and work in me.

God isn’t like the fairy godmother in Cinderella, just waving a magic wand and making everything wonderful and “sparkly.” Rather,  He stirred up my soul in almost indiscernible steps at first. A song  heard here, the word of a friend there. The verse I read that morning. An unexpected invitation rendered. A reminding thought of an opportunity nearly passed by because of my recent indifference. And, in answer to my pitiful prayer, He began stirring in my heart, creating the desire and the will to do what needed to be done

“For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”  Philippians 1:6

Today, especially, I have reason to sing. The Holy Spirit, truly a Comforter, the gift of Jesus to His own, has worked in my heart and mind. I am refreshed, changed and recharged. I know it is His work because in my own strength I most certainly would not have pulled out of my emotional, spiritual and artistic black hole.  So, here, today, God has jolted me with this glorious day that begs my soul to sing. As the Psalmist says,  He is Good and does good. Psalm 119:68  I will praise Him for all His wonderful works which He has made known to me.

Question:

Are you bumbling around in despair? Are you struggling with winter gloom? Will you call on God to help you?